Keith & Micah on Stuff
by Kevin D. Hendricks

Keith Hoerig and Micah Ortega on FIF's beginnings:
Micah: "We were just a local band trying to help create a scene and it turned out we ended up being an international band."
Keith: "International Superstars. We can't even walk down the street without people screaming, 'Ah, it's Five Iron Frenzy.'"

Keith Hoerig and Micah Ortega on music downloads:
Keith: "For the last probably three years we've seen a steady decline in our album sales, but there's been an increase in our concert tickets. Which indicates to me that we're not losing popularity, but that we're not selling records for some reason. And yet the kids know the words to all the songs, go figure. I suppose there's other things that could be blamed besides the downloading, but that's--"
Micah: "--the best scapegoat right now."
Keith: "Yeah, as far as I can tell, that's what it is. That's what explains that situation. And yes, that takes money out of our pocket. It makes it hard. But I think the Internet is way to powerful of a tool to ignore that as means of getting music out there, there just needs to be more things like the Apple music store, where artists are still fairly compensated but consumers pay a fair price for what they're getting. Because $16.98 for a CD is not a fair price."
Micah: "Yeah, that's ridiculous."
Keith: "That is a ridiculous price."

Keith Hoerig on regrets:
"There's always things that everybody in the band thinks we could have done different or better, but I think that's using hindsight. At the time every decision we made was the best we could do and we worked the best we could at the time. Because of that I don't think I have any regrets."

Keith Hoerig on cell phones:
"There should be an editorial note in here: Keith keeps leaving to talk on his phone. He should not be rude and turn his phone off during interviews."

Keith Hoerig and Micah Ortega on a FIF Tribute Album and what bands they'd like to see on such an album:
Keith: "This is an excellent idea, anyone reading this, you should think about it."
Micah: "Stryper."
Keith: "Souljunk."
Micah: "Rita Springer. What would be funny is if she did a funny song."
Keith: "I don't care who covers our stuff, I just wish we could have been part of an Altar Boys tribute album, which no one has ever done that. That's a good idea. How come no one's ever done that? Or a Mortal tribute record? How come no one's ever done that? That's a really good idea."
Micah: "Extol. That would be awesome. A lot of our fast songs, guitar wise, are totally rooted in metal. It'd be great to have an actual metal band play our stuff, instead of us false metal musicians."
Keith: "We're false metal."

Keith Hoerig and Micah Ortega on what songs they'd like to cover for Sparrow Records's U2 Tribute album, even though they didn't have such an opportunity:
Keith: "Anything off War. I'd like 'Sunday Bloody Sunday,' '40' would be really good. Most of their new record is great. 'Beautiful Day.'"
Micah: "I like the 'Stuck in a Moment' song."
Keith: "'Walk On.'"
Micah: "Pretty much anything they put out, excluding Pop and Zooropa.
Keith: "Those two records are a dark time in the life of a U2 fan. Though there's some good stuff on there."
Micah: "I wonder if a U2 fan who's now a fan, got into U2 at the Zooropa time, and they were really bummed out about the new record?"

Keith Hoerig on Rumors and the FIF Message Board:
"Somebody on our message board tried to start a rumor that Five Iron is gay. Someone responded to that by saying 'no that can't be true because I had an orgy with two of the members.' That's a typical day in the life of Five Iron and the Five Iron message board. I'd like to thank all of the people who come to the message board for telling such lies about us. It makes us feel wonderful. I love the message board when people are truthful, I've seen some really cool things happen with the message board. But when people lie like that, lying is just destructive no matter what medium you use it in."

Keith Hoerig and Micah Ortega on the life lessons of trailer maintenance:
Keith: "Be sure to load a trailer tongue heavy. That's a good life lesson."
Interviewer: "What happened?"
Keith: "Lots of weaving."
Micah: "It was a combination of a bunch of problems--"
Keith: "Like brake failure."
Micah: "Yeah, we had brakes on the trailer, only one side worked so when you hit the brakes one side would want to stop and the other side would keep going, which would cause a fish tail. And then when it was loaded heavy in the back and light in the front that caused the fish tail to be even worse. We had two flat tires out of four -- that doesn't help much. Trailer maintenance is a good thing."
Keith: "Yeah, we all know how to maintain trailers."
Micah: "Not that we do it."
Keith: "Yeah, we don't do it. Avoid trailer maintenance. That's the life lesson."